For those who might benefit from some therapeutic warping of reality here are the twenty NewZoid headlines voted best of the day for February 25, 2003.

1-
Louisiana Man Drank Half U.S. Alcohol-Study
2-
Justices Rule Against Humanity
3-
Senate Faces Murder Charges
4-
Florida Wildlife Officials Found In Foods
5-
Police Claim Isaac Newton Predicted End Of Low-digit Plates
6-
Colorectal Screening Taking Closer Look At Cesar Film Awards
7-
Florida Professor Landing Exclusive Interview With Her Student
8-
'Africa's Cannes' Refuses To Dismiss Pee-Wee Herman Case
9-
Home Depot Looks For New Ways To Find, Repair Shuttle Tile Damage
10-
End Of The World Plagues Smokers Kicking The Habit
11-
'Pianist,' 'Two Towers' Injure 9
12-
Swiss Drug Giant Roche Wins 8 Grammys
13-
Henman Investigating Rash Of Fame
14-
Western Jets Launch Missile Into Sea Of More Footage
15-
Getaway Driver Ate Gem-Filled Condoms
16-
'Stupid White Men' Sees Software Acquisitions Ahead
17-
Princess Diana's Former Lover Hewitt Steals Pakistan Intelligence Chief's Shoes
18-
'Stupid White Men' May Not Be All That Ails U.S. Economy
19-
Queen Denying Sex Abuse Accusations
20-
John McMorran, Oldest American Man, OKs Release Of Convicted Molester From Mental Hospital

Best Wishes,
Daniel Young